“Sears Catalogue Man”.

SPECIAL DELIVERY: I am the Sears Catalogue Man.


Have I got your attention now?. No, I am not the Sears model with the left hand in his pocket and joyful and debonair white toothy smile showing off the suit of the month. I, am the end of the chain in the marketing world, I deliver the catalog to your door.

And the end result of the high priced help, cascades to me, a lowly paid, bookie, who delivers to the door step or mail box. Rain, sheet or sleet or snow will not deter me, why you ask, because, I won’t go out and drop them off unless it’s SUNNY!. The only weak link has shown its self. Its me.

To tell the truth, the longer you procrastinate about doing the job, the more you have to do to meet the dead line of when these books are to be delivered. So, a sunny day is bonus but I will deliver them no matter the weather.

Cooked like a dinner or frozen like a popsicle. I was going to say like a bed sheet, those were the days when the clothes were hung outside, no matter the weather and then brought in, stiff as a board. So, you know, I am as old as dirt. There is nothing like a fresh frozen sheet!!.

So, far I have only been bitten by one dog, whom got away from his master, a very petite lady, who was knocked off her feet and dragged a few more feet until he met me, with his teeth in my upper thigh region. It was a big son of a bitch, a beast n small bear mix. :"Cujoe"

Lucky, for me I had the Christmas Wish book in my hand and he got to read it before the household did. All, 873 pages including the plastic cover were given to him in quick blow to the nose. Now, that’s what I call “speed reading”. My pride was more offended than the bite, but it still left a bruise where he made contact. The book deflected most of the energy from me.Saved by Sears.

Across the street, another lady is walking her dog and pissing herself laughing as she was a witness to the “dancing bear n catalog guy” going at it. I don’t remember everything. I am sure the noise level for a short time was exceedingly loud. Feet’s don’t fail we now.! Exit, stage left!.

Whistle, while you work has a new meaning to me now. So, whenever I approach this house I do give a wolf whistle to see if the “Cujoe” is in the yard. If he is near, I disappear, once bite, twice shy, another mystery cleared up about where that saying came from. The things you do for a dime!!. There are some friendly dogs out there, but not all on my route.

Stay tuned, I be writing about the other adventures as they happen to the “Sears Catalogue Man”.