Motorcycle Photography: An Art Form

Motorcycle Photography: An Art Form

The Buffalo Theory

I was asked how I determined what I wrote about and what shaped my thoughts. This was a question that was tossed around among some of friends or people I know on this subject. Well, I said as an example to-days conversation can be a topic to expand on and I might do it.

I then mentioned the “buffalo theory” in my usual ramblings to get the topics going and see if there is any interest in the group. But, after a few beers this never happened so I left and let them drool in their stupor.

So, to continue my musing I offer the following for you to read and if its of any interest to you that’s fine and if its not, it wasn’t going to be anyway. The quality of my answers is in proportion to the amount of malted beverages consumed as the wisdom of the inner cranium is released and I am either brilliant or stupid.

The Buffalo Theory as told by Cliff Clavin:

No one can explain this as well as Cliff Clavin, on Cheers. One afternoon at Cheers, Cliff Clavin was explaining the Buffalo Theory to his buddy Norm. and here's how it went:

"Well ya see, Norm, it's like this... A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members.

"In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But naturally it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first.

In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers."

The in-laws also have to put up with me, I am a pain or a pleasure, depends on the mood I guess. I, didn’t want to be moneyed or eminent and I have achieved that plateau rather easily, so I have impertinence.



moneyed or eminent ??



Antelope Canyon

Antelope Canyon 2012

The beauty of nature.

Is this place going to hell or what??.

Hi Joe:

Thank you for the e-mail you sent about the Lady Prime Minister in Australia. It was very interesting, that one I sent to a council person in our fair city.

This person was not happy about the “stance” or “rhetoric” of the Prime minister and asked me not to send any more forwards to her, oops I wasn’t going to say that, and give away the persons ID. A big no-no. oh, well I guess that’s makes me a lawyer too, I am trying to spell liar,??.

This person was once offended because the council “said the Lord’s Prayer” at the beginning of each session and she felt there was exclusion to people of marginal faith. Not some faith, no faith and in order to be” inclusive” she felt the Lord’s Prayer was not providing this feature.

After some discussion and public input, which was minimal the act was passed to “exclude” the Lord’s prayer from the council and have a minute of silent reflection. Soon, the singing of the national hymn will be??. “exclusive”. Is this place going to hell or what??.

Tell you what, I am going to go there some time and say the Lord’s Prayer out loud. I wonder if I would be called on that and given a” suspension” from the inclusive council’s reflection in time moment.

Since, I would be the only person doing this action, that would make a “exclusive act” of defiance to the councils wishes. Another, no-no???. Stay tuned, I think I have found a purpose in life.

Anyway Joe, such is life and as long as the mug-wumps continue to thrive , there will always be some kind of strive and people that will take an “exception” to the rule and fight it. Which is a good thing we don’t want any “exclusions” to the likes of the “inclusive”.

Being well educated does make you any better than the person with a mental disability as matter of fact the person with a disability has a better out look than the educated person. The disabled person sees it for what it is and deals with it and gives a so what attitude and its done.

The high brow beats their chest and moans and cries and makes you want to put them out of their misery. A purpose in life has been found. So, in order to spread this misery around they elect themselves to serve the public and we soon regret ever voting the clods into office. “Misery loves company”, now you know where that saying came from. Just, saying.!!.

Thanks,Joe, say hi to the misse's.





Yes, thats "exclusive"



I have a spare tire to fit a Mack truck!!

Hi Joe:
Just for the record please read the following before you go any further.

Summer officially kicks off today, with the summer solstice marking the longest day of the year on June 20, at least in the Northern Hemisphere. Yes, its July 16th. So what, write your own story.

This year's summer solstice takes place a day earlier than it's been for the past three years, due to the fact that leap year-day-February-29-calendar-cultures-science, 2012 is a leap year.

That will explain why my spring training has gone all to hell. I am trying to rejuvenate my self to the former glory I once was. Not that it matters but I need to explain it some how. Besides my age I am also fighting a friend called gravity. Its responsible for a lot of sagging parts, which I need to firm up.

Not a pretty picture is it. Don’t think anything other than loose fitting boxer shorts or else if you try to see a person in a swimmers Speedo, you will hurl your lunch. We now pause for that thought to work thru your system and wait to see if your food stays put. (30 seconds should be enough).

I have wanted to ride my “Beemer” for some time now and I need to get in shape to enjoy it more. This bike is meant for a younger body which will take the harsh ride and narrow seat. When I ride I am sure people must wonder why I have 2 sets of saddle bags on the bike. Serious rider with a lot of clothes?.

Walking and playing with the kids is low impact and not too bad, so I need to step it up a notch. I am using my son’s mountain bike with 18 gears in any fashion you want, from real slow to hard core. The seat is harder than the Beemer and it tests all my athletic parts, it needs a fatter seat, softer and wider-wider.

I went for a short ride and I was done, all body parts went on strike and I had to push the bike home for a block. I didn’t know so many parts could hurt at the same time. Going downhill is easy, up hill,.. not!!. To say I had an after glow after the pain went away would describe it right on the button.

Maybe a stationary bike and vibrating recliner would suit my purpose until I got up to speed. Too much hockey, malted beverages and those darn pepperettes. Man, tell you what I have a spare tire to fit a Mack truck. Time to lose that puppy.

All this exercise has made me tired, so bye for now Joe, its 9:30 am, in the cave and I hear my chair calling me. A short nap will help I am sure, unless the misses catches me and its over. Life is grand, ain’t it ?? .!!

 <><>

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This is why you all, IS FAT!!



Musings of an old guy

I would usually write to this to Joe because he has interesting slant on life and he is my rock of strength so to speak. I don’t ask for his advice, I get it and its free and I don’t agree with it sometimes.

His answers provide more thoughts and ideas for my writing or running of the brain which is given to the paper we all read. I call them my ramblings. I beat around the bush to tease you and then I give you the truth as far as I am able, writers privileges.

Joe, should have been a therapist because of his manners but he said no, I want to have a job where I am free of the world’s problems carried by so few people, and our hats off to the professionals that have chosen to help guide us thru life’s road of mystery.

Having said that there are people that are born to do this and those who wish they could. If, we could get the right person the first time how simple life would be, personal opinion and I am not slamming those who are not proficient at their job. Somebody has to do the work.

They just make it more stressful to get proper help and continue to mend on the road of life. This covers all professionals in the all the fields, even the almighty plumber. As humble as this job is, its one of the most important in our lives. Try and remember when the last time you had a bathroom problem and you know what I mean.

Just to get in that frame of mind, turn off the water to the main vanity and cover it over and use the one downstairs until the plumbers shows to fix your blockage, while you are it cover over the mirror as well and only cold water for the tub or shower. Life is grand.?

To easy, ok, now the pooper isn’t working, scramble for the throne. Its not a pretty picture is it.? As humble as this man is he is able to make a house call and help you, when the last time you had that kind of service.?

Be a good story to write about. Sorry, I am off topic or am I?.

Anyway, I am going to try and persuade Joe to become a internet shrink and have a disclaimer that it “ works for me, does not mean it will work for you”. Joe, the plumber, the shit is theoretically to run downhill but sometimes it don’t.!!

Who, can you call??. Write or call me now and we can flush this problem together. Inspiring isn’t it. Well, it’s a stretch, but if you are at wits end, how bad can it get??..............,are you thinking about it or not??.

Just to get you in the proper frame of thought, “your shit does stink and you aren’t alone”.



                                                                 Who, can you call??.

The lady with a bike at the Canadian Tire store.

Hi Joe;

Today’s adventure for me is not unusual as you know. I don’t go looking for trouble, it finds me. And today was what I expected.

The first order of business for me was to return some tile back to Home Depot and then go look for a replacement for it. It was not suitable of course. Here, is where the misses should be and decide for sure instead of me, I like everything even if it doesn’t match.

So, I can’t find a associate in the store, so for get about it, I am leaving and I need to go to the tire store for something.???, I can’t remember so I will cruise the aisles and maybe it will pop out and find me.

So while I am in this store I spot a lady with a bike and she is pushing it out the doors to the parking lot and a very nice lady at that and the bike, what bike.?? So, what was I looking for again. I bump into some people and I don’t need what I want anyway.

I leave and would you believe it or not I spot the bike lady again right beside my truck. Karma . And she is struggling to get this bike in to the car. It’s a small cross over SUV and it couldn’t hold more than 4 people or 4 children empty .Plus, some other stuff in the very back of the car.

I offer to help. Yes, I offer to help, I should have just went back into the store and let another Boy Scout help her. I can’t do that, I had to help, it’s a compulsion thing. So in the middle is a infant car seat and we have to remove it in order to lay down the folding seats.

Easier said than done. Its better if only one person does this operation instead of two. To say I was bumped and elbowed would describe these actions which followed and never mind the lady’s soft voice purring  in my ear. (instructions) Yes, its close, warm and getting warmer and dangerous, but a scout can handle it.

Diplomatic, Sauvé, is the word that comes to mind in our discussion of how to get the bike in. She has one idea and the “caveman” has another, the boy scout is now off duty. So, we try her idea first and then mine. This bike is getting heavier by the minute and my batteries are in need of charging.

So, I stop to gather my breath back and have a small discussion of the project. Bad move, should have kept on stuffing the bike in the car. Why,??, because I now am looking at a very beautiful women and she is just smiling her face off at the situation we are in. I feel my batteries starting recharge.!!!

Its very hard to concentrate at the job at hand when you have such a able bodied partner helping while all the while I feel like I am in a movie on u tube or A F V. All I can say is, the bike did get stuffed into the car and I am too humbled to describe this any further.  (:)

With the doors closed and she is safely packed into the car, I make another gaff and ask if she will need a hand to “unstuffy” the bike at her place.?? Luckily, she says no and shakes my hand and thanks me for the help and I mumble “no trouble” its all in days work.

I know you are thinking, why don’t you just offer to use your truck and take it back to her house.??. Yep, another mystery in life and I am going to let you think about it, I was having fun here.

I didn’t go back into the store because I was unable to think what I wanted. But, I certainly got what I needed. A helpful gesture, a work out better than the gym, and a gracious thank you. Boy Scouts, what a job.!!

See you all later.




 

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Should we be worried?? Its worth a look.!!

http://brie-hoffman.hubpages.com/hub/Muslim-World-how-muslims-will-take-over-the-world-via-population-growth

Women are in charge, not a question, but a statement !

Hi Joe;

Its sure is another hot one in the country today and tell you what I am outstanding in my field. Not, real good at what I do but, I am outside standing in the field, while the women folk are inside.

I don’t want to complain about this arrangement but sometimes it don’t seem fair and I mentioned that fact to the misses. Well, she says you know you are right, so, lets sit down and talk about it.

She says we both get up at the same time and she lists off she has to do before the kids get on the bus. So, far all I have to do is go to bathroom and have a coffee and sit down and try to wake up. I, mentioned I would like to help with some of those chores.?

Well, help I, did do, was not up to equality of the misses and she said I move too slow. I said I had all day to work and do stuff, so what’s the hurry?. Well, that maybe so, but the kids have to leave in an ½ hour, so move it!!!. I, tried to do as she asked and then I was asked to sit down and get outta the way.??.

So, I tried this for the next hour and you know she left me outstanding in the field where I started from. So, I decided its fair that she be inside and I can manage outside, only I am going to move a little quicker so I can have a break on time.

The critters all seem to be fine with my time schedule and as far as I know none of then were complaining. So, if they were, it just sounded like they were saying hello and hurry up with food. I, think I will get one of the kids to help me, might go quicker.

Because, they have the same problem as I do, we are in the way and we are asked to get outta of the kitchen. When she gets rolling in there its like a “flying ninja with the Ganske razor-sharp knifes” making up stir fried sushi and egg omelets and I don’t know where the extra arms come from either.

So, yes if you are in the way you might end up as part of the main course or become slightly injured with a wallop up side of your head. Boys, come with your poppa, its safer over here and we can finish the chores too.

Well, looks like its time for some breakfast, and its only 6:45 a.m., so Joe how’s your day??.

Write to you all later, say hi to your misses.

Bruce

Shocking Images Follow Super Derecho

Shocking Images Follow Super Derecho

FYI: A lot of people were surprised by this event.